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  • Roanna Rhodes C.L.C.

How To Deal With Rejection In A Postive Way

Rejection is a painful, but common occurrence in everyone’s life. That’s why I’m convinced learning how to deal with rejection properly is an essential life skill.

Whether we get rejected by a person close to us or by someone we barely know, this rejection has an impact on various aspects of our lives. Speaking from personal experience, I believe that rejection can have a major effect on our mental health.

Keep reading to discover what social rejection is and how to handle it in a positive way.

What Is Rejection?

Social rejection occurs when a person is left out on purpose from a social relationship or a social event. It can be as simple as not being invited to a party or as traumatizing as receiving a breakup text.

Rejection usually happens between romantic partners, friends, family members, colleagues, or acquaintances. A person may be rejected by another person or by a whole group of people.

How Does Rejection Affect Our Mental Health?

Rejection may have negative effects on our mental health. Some examples from the American Psychological Association (APA) include:

  • Development of mental health issues like depression and anxiety

  • More negative emotions like anger, jealousy, and sadness

  • Difficulty in forming and sustaining social connections

  • Lower performance in mental tasks

  • Increase in social aggression

  • Less impulse control

  • Poor sleep quality

APA explains that a broken heart is similar to a broken arm as far as the brain is concerned. The pain of rejection is very real.

How Can You Handle Rejection in a Positive Way?

Thankfully, it’s possible to avoid or minimize the negative impact of rejection if we learn how to deal with rejection in constructive ways.

Look at the Bright Side

It’s normal to feel lonely when a relationship or friendship ends. After all, the person you are saying goodbye to has likely played a major role in your life.

It’s tempting to idealize your connection now that you are apart. However, the reality is that your relationship was never perfect.

While you can continue to be grateful for the good memories, focus more on the reasons why you are no longer together.

Make a list of the practical and emotional reasons why you and your partner or friend are incompatible with each other, as suggested in an article published by TIME magazine.

Read this list whenever you feel tempted to keep grieving over what you lost even after a long time has passed.

Use Social Media Wisely

Social media can make you feel better or worse, depending on how you use it.

On one hand, it might be harder for you to move on from the relationship if you continue to regularly monitor the newsfeed of your ex-partner or ex-friend. The person will continue to be on your mind if you don’t unfollow him or her.

You may continue to have lingering feelings of affection if you constantly check out his or her posts. You may also feel upset in case you see that he or she has already entered into a new relationship with somebody else.

On the other hand, spending time catching up with your other family and friends can help you heal faster.

Focusing on other people who are still an active part of your life can help you make significant strides towards recovery.. Even better, message your friends and relatives directly to renew and strengthen your connections with them.

Reconnecting with your social circle will remind you that, while you may have lost someone, there are still many valuable people in your life.

Reaffirm Your Self-Worth

You may be tempted to blame yourself for getting rejected by someone. However, just because you experienced rejection doesn’t mean that you are not worthy of love and acceptance.

It’s important that you reaffirm your self-worth on a regular basis. An article by NBC News recommends that you focus on your positive personal qualities.

Make a list of your personal attributes that other people – and even your own self – appreciate about you. Just because one person doesn’t appreciate your good traits, it doesn’t mean that no one else does.

Learn To Love Yourself

There are perks from being involved in a relationship or friendship. However, it definitely entails social responsibilities on your end as well.

The end of a relationship is also the start of your freedom in a sense. You can use the time you once invested taking care of your partner or friend to take care of yourself instead.

Take the chance to pamper yourself. You can go to the spa to get a message or to the salon to have your hair styled. You can also splurge on a new fabulous outfit or the perfect pair of shoes.

You can also treat yourself in small ways on a regular basis. Take the time to read your favorite book or to binge on your favorite Netflix series.